Living in Indonesia is like being invited to a party where you’re not sure about the dress code, but everyone’s too polite to tell you you’re overdressed. You’ll figure it out eventually, but it helps to know a few things first.
Whether you’re in bustling Jakarta, chill Yogyakarta, or beachy Bali, or somewhere in between, Indonesia has its own rhythm. People are warm, community matters, and small things can mean a lot. You might even offend someone just by whistling at night (more on that later).
Here’s your lighthearted guide to navigating Everyday Indonesia, and settling in without accidentally starting a cultural fire.
1. Smiling, Nodding, and Still Not Sure Just What Happened
Welcome to the land of polite confusion.
At the heart of Indonesian culture are two deeply rooted values: rukun (harmony) and gotong royong (mutual cooperation). People are taught from a young age to keep peace, avoid open conflict, and always be considerate to others.
Politeness and indirect communication are key. You might notice that people often avoid saying “no” directly, which can be awkward. Instead, people might say:
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- “Maybe later” (probably a no)
- “We’ll see” (almost definitely a no)
- Just smile and change the topic (take the hint)
You’ll also hear a lot of titles like Pak (Mr.), Bu (Mrs.), Mas and Mbak (big brother/sister–even if you’re not related). Using them shows respect, and people will appreciate it.
Pro tip: if someone is smiling and nodding.. They might be agreeing. Or they might just be being polite. Welcome to the adventure!
Pamali 101: Why You Shouldn’t Whistle at Night (Seriously)
There are a lot of unspoken rules in Indonesia. Locals might not explain them unless you ask, but once you do, get ready for stories.
Some personal favorites from the world of pamali (taboo):
- Don’t whistle at night: unless you’re trying to invite spirits for a jam session.
- Don’t sit in doorways: it blocks energy… and your luck.
- Don’t sweep the floor after dark: you might sweep away your fortune.
There’s also adat, or local customs, which vary by region. What’s totally normal in Bali might be a big no-no in Aceh.
Rule of thumb: If a grandma says “Don’t do that,” just don’t do it.
When Faith Fills the Streets in Everyday Indonesia
Religion is everywhere in Indonesia–in the most respectful, colorful, and deeply felt ways.
The country is officially religious, and that plays out in daily life:
- Calls to prayer echo five times a day in Muslim areas
- Canang offerings dot the sidewalks in Bali
- Major holidays (like Ramadhan, Nyepi, Eid, and Christmas) affect traffic, business hours, and even how loud you’re allowed to be)
If you visit a temple, mosque, or church:
- Dress modestly.
- Take off your shoes if you’re told to.
- Never step over offerings.
You don’t have to join in–but it’s cool to understand what’s going on around you.
Rice, Bolsters, & Rolling Snack Carts: The Joys of Everyday Indonesia
This is where the fun quirks live.
Rice isn’t a side dish–it’s the main character. You can just eat a whole pizza, and someone might still say, “That’s not a real meal.” Real meal = rice.
Other delightful quirks:
- Jajan ke warung: daily snack runs to roadside food stalls are a national hobby.
- Arisan: part of social gathering, part lottery, part secret support system.
- Guling: the beloved bolster pillow that Indonesians can’t sleep without.
- Street vendors: you’ll hear “Baksooo!” or “Tahu bulattt!” before you even see the cart.
Fun fact: It’s common to ride three people on a motorbike or squeeze into a tiny angkot (minivan taxi). It’s just part of the adventure!
Blend In Without Disappearing
You will make mistakes. You’ll sit where you shouldn’t, gesture the wrong way, maybe offend someone without realizing. It’s okay.
Indonesians are generally very forgiving, especially if you’re kind, curious, and open to learning.
So take off your shoes, say “Terima kasih,” smile a lot, and enjoy the ride. Because once you get into the rhythm, Everyday Indonesia is one of the most welcoming places you’ll ever live.
